If you haven’t seen Downtown Abbey, then you really haven’t been living. I am not ashamed to say I finished an entire season of the hour-long drama in one weekend, and have been in mourning ever since I finished the third season. The thing that really draws me in is their lifestyle. Like why does Sybill complain that her life consist of going to balls, parties and dinners? And why was Mary so hesitant to marry Matthew? The heir of Downtown, yes they’re cousins but that’s just a small detail, that can easily be overlooked. You have a personal ladies maid, whose job description includes doing your hair, everyday? Yes please. A set of kitchen maids who prepare your breakfast, lunch, dinner and afternoon tea? Of course. Balls and charity events to which you get to wear the finest fashions of the 20’s? Why not; and best of all drinks in the library ever day after dinner, and not a judgmental eye in sight.
Please never use the words mouth and lubricated in the same sentence
Only in the Bronx do you question the origin on feces found on the sidewalk.
Here is something I’ve heard twenty three times too many over the past four years.
This pisses me off for several reasons. Firstly, in defense of all the white boys out there, don’t make them seem like they are some alien creatures, although some of them may be (I joke). They are men just like all the other men.
Secondly, don’t make it seem like it takes a certain type of black girl to be attracted to a white guy. An attractive man is an attractive ass man no matter what color he is — he’s just good looking, and call me crazy but I like myself a good-looking man.
Sometimes my friends will turn to me and be like, “Oh yeah, but you like white guys, right?” as if to say I have an exclusive contract with the White Men of America Inc. where I am only allowed to be attracted to those of a certain European descent.
Now let me tell you something that many of you can relate to: at an institute of higher learning, in the northeast region of the United States, our numbers drop DRASTICALLY. I’m talking ‘I can count the number of brothers on my own hands’ drop. Pickings are slim and slim are the pickings, and if you want to be a gold member of the BBC let me tell you something, video honey, you’re gonna have to take a number and wait in line.
What I am saying is, a girl’s gotta do what a girl’s gotta do, so excuse me if at times I walk out of the dark and into the light (hardy har).
What I’m trying to say is this: stop making me feel weird about myself when I say I think a guy is cute, and if he happens to be white don’t make it seem like I have some weird thing for white guys. FYI I have a thing for all guys. #blackgirlproblems
So you’ve put out 20 or 85 resumes and you’ve finally heard back from someone! yay! It’s probably been so long that you’ve forgotten what companies you’ve applied to. You’re excited! Gone are the days of lounging around the house all day, watching all your favorite TV shows, eating endless amounts of Frosted Cheerios at 2:30 pm, and having casual lunches with friends at 4. Finally you’ve entered the real world, you have a bedtime, you have a desk, a computer, a phone, and if you’re lucky a time sheet. Then, after a week, you realize it sucks.
Working is terrible.
I hate waking up early, I hate answering the phone, I hate driving to work, I hate punching in on a time card, I hate having to smile at co-workers at 8:30 in the morning and I especially hate having to put on pants, every.single.day.
You think work life is filled with happy hours, flirting with co-workers, and cute work clothes. You’ll finally be able to save up enough money to buy that fabulous blazer from Zara or those casual nude pumps from Steve Madden, until you see your paycheck and realize that $10 an hour is actually $7 an hour….thank you, taxes.
I could be delivering pizzas at papa john’s and make more money than I do now
Like Eli I’m from new Orleans I’m a giant in this bitch move the G and add an S and put the I before the N and put the A in front of that and that is what I am to the end.
Can you guess what Wayne is spelling?
WELCOME- to Weezy Wednesday’s